I think I may have mentioned it was going to be a hard month for my heart. That I wasn’t sure I wanted November to arrive, but it did. And I am hurting a bit. And struggling to find joy. As if, some days, joy is swirling around me and I am making feeble grabs for it, not managing to catch it. Or if I grab hold of some of that swirling joy, the chilly winds of November manage to sweep it from my grasp. It’s a lonely time. Maybe this just happens to military parents? We hold it in. We smile, we nod, we answers questions about our children, though we aren’t sure if we are giving the right information because we aren’t sure we have been *given* the right information.
In the middle of this evening, I felt a nudge inside my heart. A calling to move away from the “grasping for joy” routine, and to reach instead for the promises of my God.
I am loved.
I forget sometimes, in the every day, that the extraordinary is true: I am loved by a God who is unchanging, unmoved by anything, who keeps His promises to me.
I am a daughter of the King.
Royal blood in my veins.
I need to stop running around — trying to chase down joy like a crazy person — when the God of the universe just wants me to be still and know..
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.”