Today, our pastor spoke about the amazing love God has for us and how He showed this love by willingly sacrificing His own son, Jesus, to save us.
Then he spoke his truth, which no one could argue, and one which I had thought over and over..before.
Before our son enlisted in the military.
He said “Now I love you all, but I wouldn’t sacrifice one of my sons to save you!”
My eyes filled and my brain froze and I realized something: this is why it is often so painfully hard to be a military mom or dad.
Why some days hurt more than others. Why our hearts are so often burdened and heavy.
Why we shouldn’t have to be told to cheer up, chin up, be stronger, stop worrying.
Everyday, our hearts are torn in two –wanting to say the same: “I wouldn’t sacrifice my child for you! ” and knowing that, as military families, supporting our soldiers and our country, we have been asked to face that very real possibility.
Before? I didn’t fully understand.
Now? I know far more.
I read the stories and cry with the “Gold Star Moms” who long for one more hug or day or moment. Who likely long to take their supportive words back, to not let go, not say goodbye.
Wanting to declare their soldiers life to be greater than your safety, greater than the call of their country.
I feel the risk, waiting, not too far on our own horizon.
In both my faith, and in my freedom and patriotism, I wish it hadn’t taken me so very long to understand the weighty fullness of these words:
“For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” – Mark 10:45