Truth time: I have struggled lately to find joy.
To feel joy.
I smile and I laugh at moments but then BAM! out of nowhere I fall apart and life overwhelms me.
Why have I told my husband about 9,456 times in the last few weeks “I can’t feel joy..where is my joy? Why does life seem so hard?”
Tonight we had a few moments to talk it over and I discovered so much.
But I promise to keep it brief (hooray!)
Life is in chaos. Busy. Demanding. Frantic. The big stuff is so big and so I begin to think I need to control things, and people. Then I get upset when I can’t – because who can control others?
Not me! So I worry and stress and spend even more time controlling. Except I’m not.
I am actually just adding to the chaos, the disorder, the panic and the anxiety levels.
I need to believe God when He says to ‘trust’ or to give Him my worries, cares and anxiety.
I think..well, I think I forgot again.
To leave space.
Space for joy.
I filled all the space in my life with worry and anxiety – trying to control things and (ironically) trying to force open some space for joy.
Really – all I have to do is hand Him everything He asks me to hand over anyway..all my cares, my worries, my plans..all of it.
If I hand it to Him I am left with space. And into that space He pours joy.
This a very uneven trade for Him.
That is why He is love.
Only Love says “give me all that hurts your heart, all that worries you and troubles you, hand it over and then..wait..keep your hands open..I will fill them back up – with joy and hope.”
My. What a good God.
Opening my hands – receiving joy – getting a grip and Authentically Yours,
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” Romans 15:13